*Edited to remove cursing. A friend who tracks and analyzes Congressional voter/campaign sentiment in northeast races finished compiling the latest cycle. She tells me cussing (swearing) produced some interesting patterns. When candidates swore at public events, while taking a combative stance, the reactions were positive. But, when they did it in direct message calls to action, it was even greater. As in, bring money in greater. When I submitted a direct message for sign off this week, the last one I will be sending out of this office, I got back one edit. Change a word to damn. Huh? Then I happened across national messaging that seemed to suggest swearing was effective. Ok, I thought. We never said liar before, and that’s changed.
The verdict, no. Swearing doesn’t solicit a positive reaction, or any reaction really. Verdict is still out on liar.
Back to the rant.
If you learn anything while eyeball deep in strategic ad placements in every nook and cranny that your segments may be hiding in, it’s how many ways and directions you can come at them. Perhaps the only major hiccup is finding what it will cost your firm. And if you speak to a seller, as we did this week, they aren’t all that generous with figures on the phone, or email, either. They want willingness to spend. And ribbed us for not wanting to disclose what we’d be willing to spend. With ever an eye on an audience’s undivided attention, we just want to know how much exclusive :30 spots at DMVs in major metropolitan markets cost. Not three more plans our brand may be interested in. Mind you, the conversation started with no major brand ever having expressed an interest in buying spots. Sad and pathetic plebeians stuck in the DMV oblivion that is the two hour wait, and not one major brand has ever called? Even the seller brags that these people have nowhere to go; and nothing else to look at. For advertisers, the DMV is A Clockwork Orange. Or, is it the other way around? Meh.
We think we’re clever for digging this up. They think they are clever for making us dig deeper. How deep do you dig for every bit of undivided attention? Or, new and better ways to get it?
The buy is for a major motorcycle manufacturer. They’ve gone so far as to implement artificial intelligence (Power, 2017); and robots! Brands are now Sarah Connor(ing) you to help Wisconsinite T800s with Six Sigma prime directives to meet KPIs. And they are. If I may drag this Terminator metaphor on a bit longer; it’s a New York City dealership that is the Cyberdyne Industries behind this feat of artificial intelligence. Wrap your meat computer around that 2,930% increase in sales leads! If you can…dummy.
But, the NYC dealership may not have been the bastion of self-aware systems that Harvard Business, or Forbes, or any of the financial pubs that fawned over them, had made them out to be. The umbrella corporation was behind it, or so it claims. And…when isn’t it? It depends on who you ask. Rumor has it this dealer, down on his luck, happened across an algorithm geek while walking in Riverside Park. Doesn’t it always happen in a moment of reflection? My inner-cynic (NYer) places me in the same scenario, shooing rats (Frishberg, 2018), wondering why the I opened a motorcycle dealership on the Upper East Side in a city that criminalizes e-bikes. In a city no less, where two-wheeled whips account for less than two percent of the total registered vehicles on the road, and 14 percent of total traffic fatalities. What does the AI say about that? Did I mention New York ranks fifth in the nation in the number of motorcycle registrations? Sorry, we’re leaning more toward an uphill road for any dealership in NYC, especially on the Upper East.
This isn’t the only example of dealers going above and beyond. Another self-aware dealership in Indiana upped its in-house experience game by setting up a virtual reality showroom…in their showroom. While sales of VR headsets have decreased, the production of VR content remains cost prohibitive, and actual motorcycles – the same as those portrayed in the VR content – are also tanking. Note that this occurred one year after this brand’s competitor also offered a VR experience (Stanley, 2015). And they created a VR road trip to the annual Sturgis motorcycle rally. They transported people. The Indiana dealership? They immersed the audience in a showroom floor, within a showroom floor. Speaking of floors…
Looking at this through a lean manufacturing (T800) strategy. It isn’t initiative that is being rewarded. As the specialists we are (or will be), we’re one of seven wastes of lean. And as the communication management specialist you are (or will be) you’ve likely wondered what the statistical odds are of getting out of the Upper East Side alive, had you purchased a motorcycle in NYC. It’s probably significant. The meat to the potatoes, as it were.
We can call these wins, or failures. This brand could be credited for getting all Mary Parker Follett on its dealerships. Or feigning Fayolism, to grab back the ever important command and coordination from the production floor to the dealership. In either case, they let some wind under the wing. How high they fly…may be exaggerated. But that may be changing.
And…then, a blip. Augmented reality.
The cheaper, and more easily integrated and adaptable cousin of VR. If you were the one that opened the motorcycle dealership on the Upper East Side, AR would be the cousin at the wedding that opened a dental practice in Beersheba Springs, Tennessee. You think your fancy city-clicker algorithms have a one-up on ‘em. But, she’s a DMD in a town of 477 people, in a state with the fewest dentists per capita. Who is the dummy?
Our motorcycle brand hasn’t been the driver behind many of these successful dealership initiatives. They are the blister. They show up when the work is done. Now, most phones…most everything, are AR-enabled. Look at these Nikes!
Lo and behold! It’s not a dealership, but the flagship itself upon the shores of AR. There are no press releases. No tales of wobegon dealers in uphill markets and locations to swoon the business press and claim: by changing “call now” to “buy now,” sales went through the roof. It’s Manhattan! Outside of Abu Dhabi, it’s the only other place on Earth where someone has the money off-the-street to buy 15 luxury motorcycles. In Abu Dhabi, they do it because they can. In Manhattan? They do it because they are a bunch of brunch-drunk entitled snobs with nothing better to do, bro. This AR move by the brand is intentionally under radar.
We wouldn’t had known it happened if we weren’t looking for some fancy content to put on DMV screens; and really, it was just to get this DMV, a CPM. But…there it was https://seekxr.com/.
The brand just stripped the need for a franchise, retailer, and Upper-East-Side-location, just like that. Gone. The VR? Untenable. Algorithms? False hope. Sales are tanking. An Upper East Side motorcycle dealership is the success story?! No. And, no comment on the VR within showroom reality snafu in Indiana. The brand is moving away from showrooms, and retail altogether. The AI success story was a smoke screen. The top down integration of AR/VR will kill the dealership as we know it.
References
Frishberg, H. (2018, June 6). The most rat-infested neighborhoods in New York City. New York Post. Retrieved from https://nypost.com/2018/06/06/the-most-rat-infested-neighborhoods-in-new-york-city/
Power, B. (2017, May 30). How Harley-Davidson used artificial intelligence to increase New York sales leads by 2,930%. Harvard Business Review. Retrieved from https://hbr.org/2017/05/how-harley-davidson-used-predictive-analytics-to-increase-new-york-sales-leads-by-2930#comment-section
Stanley, T.L. (2015, March 13). Oculus lets motorcycle enthusiasts take a virtual trip to Sturgis. Mashable. Retrieved from https://mashable.com/2015/03/13/oculus-victory-motorcycles-sturgis/#tPxS6d9.JPqK
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